Intimate Examination

From Slipshod Squiggles

I walked into a fertility clinic.

The nurse said, "I can already tell what your problem is."

I said, "How?"

She said, "That was the back door".

Beached Body Ready

From Scott Metzger

Dating Problems - My Eyes Are . . .

From TheArgyleSweater

I went out for a winter walk this morning and found a box of frozen fish on the pavement.

I was going to hand it in to the police, but then decided it was a case of Findus Kippers!

Writer's Block

From Wrong Hands

I got kicked out of our Writers Block support group today

It made me really

What A Way To Make A Living

The 925 to Woking will be D Parton in 2 minutes

Dolly Parton Quotes:

"It costs a lot of money to look this cheap."

 

"I’m not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I’m not dumb . . . and I also know that I’m not blonde."

 

"People always ask me how long it takes to do my hair.  I don’t know, I’m never there."

How Do You Do

From Liz Climo

Why can't humans hear a dog whistle?

Because dogs can't whistle.

Now They Just Need To Be Wired In

From Kendra Allenby

I've finally saved up enough for solar panels.

What's holding me back is that I can't afford a house.