How Do You Do

From Liz Climo

Why can't humans hear a dog whistle?

Because dogs can't whistle.

Worse Than Snoring

From Speedbump

My wife and I are looking for someone to play the harmonica while we have sex.

No weirdos please.

Settings

From Loose Parts

Before my surgery my anaesthetist offered to knock me out with gas or a boat paddle.

It was an ether/oar situation.

Fountain Of Youth

From Toonhole

I went to the swimming baths today and had a pee in the deep end. The lifeguard noticed and blew his whistle so loud that I almost fell in.