Tried and Tested

From Speedbump

The Day My Dog Spontaneously Combusted

 

there he was –

chasing sticks,

doing tricks,

and all that stuff

 

next minute, woof

Brian Bilston

Escape

From Bill Boles

The last time I visited Blackpool I went on a donkey.

It took me 23 days to get there.

Habitual Criminal

From Rhymes With Orange

When one door closes and another door opens, you are probably in prison.

Siphoning Fuel

From Bizarro

From Waynovision

There's a woman in our local park flogging stolen batteries.

She sells c-cells by the seesaw.

She gives the used ones away free of charge.

Thief

From Rhymes With Orange

There's no "i" in "team".

But there are two in "schizophrenia".

Conjugal Visit

From Bizarro

Hugs

 

From Buni Comic

Valentine's Q&A's

Q: Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?
A: She stole his heart.

Q: Why did the banana go out with the prune?
A: Because it couldn't get a date!