Disastrous Accident

From OffTheMark

A man rushes to the doctor's and cries out, "Doctor, you've got to help me; I feel like I'm shrinking".

"Calm down", replies the doctor. "You'll just have to learn to be a little patient".

Emergency Distraction

From Leigh Rubin

"I've made a model of Mount Everest."

"To scale?"

"No, just to look at."

Perspective

From Rhymes With Orange

What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

One is really heavy, and the other is a little lighter.

Bad Rip

From DeathBulge

Quiet Request

From Loading Artist

Emergency

From Buni Comic

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Mother Of Invention

 

From LunarBaboon

 

 

Emergency Beacon