I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue Introduction - Norwich 25 Jun 2001

Hello, & welcome to I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue. You find us this week amid the ancient splendour of Norwich, a city that glories in a fascinating history.

As the locality has no indiginous rock supply, Norwich was built largely of flint, and here was born the craft of 'flint-knapping'. Knappers would hold a flint between their thighs to hit it with a lump hammer. These craftsmen gave us the term 'knapsack'...a painful medical condition caused by missing the flint.

Later the city became populated by Flemish weavers, who brought with them the art of canary breeding, and in a recently converted Norwich church is found the National Canary Museum, where visitors are invited to climb the tower, ring the bell, and smack their heads against a small mirror.
 
Modern Norwich is also famous for its six breweries, each providing guided tours and free tastings. Few visitors ever manage to sample the delights of all of them in a single afternoon, but let's meet four who did...

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I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue - Wolverhampton 12 Nov 2001

Hello, & welcome to I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue. You join us this week in Wolverhampton, an historic city with much to be commended.

During the 15th century, the town prospered thanks to the wool trade, which was controlled by the Leverson family, who owned much of Wolverhampton. Their long-standing interest in sheep is evidenced by place names such as Mutton Street, Woollen Alley and Hand-Wash-Only Lane.

The first ever commercial flights from British soil began here in 1862 when Henry Coxwell began his hot-air balloon service to London. In addition, Coxwell flew charter passengers to Holland, Ireland, Spain, Norway and Canada...before realising that the wind direction kept changing.

The town became well-known for the fine houses built by its merchants. One of these, Molyneux Grange, was the original headquarters of Wolverhampton Wanderers Football Club, and became the subject of national interest in 1889, when thieves broke into the trophy room...and made off with the carpet.
 
Let's meet the teams - they're four comedians who just love entertaining people...who knows, one day they might meet some entertaining people...

ISIHAC Intros

I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue Introduction - 30th Anniversary Special 13 Apr 2002

Hello, & welcome to I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue. You join us at the Playhouse Theatre in London's West End, where, in celebration of thirty years of the programme, we've been asked to record a special show.

What a different place Britain was back in 1972 - the first series of 'Last Of The Summer Wine' had only just begun its seventeenth repeat; and there were just three television channels, showing a limited selection of comedy, drama, news and sport. How TV has changed today, with digital technology providing many hundreds of channels showing a dazzling variety of gardening.

On the world stage, U.S. President Richard Nixon was re-elected. President Nixon later became known as 'Tricky Dicky' after the Watergate affair, as later did President Clinton after the Lewinsky affair.

Back home in April 1972, Britain was still grappling with the complexities of decimal currency. At the time it was feared that decimalisation might lead to inflation, with the price of consumer items such as a gallon of petrol being sneakily rounded up from three shillings and sixpence to two pounds fifty.

We've returned here to the Playhouse Theatre where our very first show was made on April 4th, 30 years ago, and as the teams arrived in their usual garb of tie-dye T shirts, paisley cravats and flared loon pants, I couldn't help but try to remember what they wore back in 1972... (30th Anniversary Special 13 Apr 2002)

 

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I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue Introduction - Leicester 10 Jun 2002

Hello, & welcome to I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue. You join us for a second week in Leicester, a city of varied culture and heritage.

Many of Leicester's place names emanate from its 9th century Danish occupation, including Deangate, Wiggesdon Lane and Unsmokedrindless Street.

Nearby places of interest include Melton Mowbray - home of the pork pie. The recipe to the original pork pie is a closely guarded secret, but its known to rely on using pork from a specific breed of pig that produces a copious amount of gelatinous fatty grease. Many breeders have successfully raised such pigs, but none has ever managed to catch hold of one.

Leicester also has plenty to offer those in search of culture; the city's museum and art gallery houses what was believed to be Britain's largest dinosaur, until the advent of ITV Digital. But there's more to Leicester today than well-known dinosaurs...Let's meet the teams...

ISIHAC Intros

I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue Introduction - Hastings 17 Jun 2002

Hello, & welcome to I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue. You join us this week in the South Coast resort of Hastings, an historic town with much to be commended.

The story of Hastings only really begins with the famous battle, which was fought at a nearby town called Battle...now what are the chances of that happening? In September 1066, William the Conqueror assembled his forces across the Channel and set sail with his army of nine thousand Normans, after one of the most confusing roll-calls ever taken. The battle took place around Senlack Hill, and after a full days' fighting, the English were defeated, and King Harold was struck in the eye by an arrow. He was carried to the Hastings Free Hospital, where he was pronounced dead, and from there to a fee-paying one, where his condition was upgraded to 'alive'.

 
In the years following the invasion, Sussex was split into feifdoms, or 'seas' as they were known, and the Sea of Hastings passed into the control of Bishop Ralph Le Bon. Sadly, the town serfs refused to take his rule seriously after he renamed the keep 'Le Bon Sea Castle'. For over a thousand years now, that fine motte and bailey castle has stood to defend the town, and repel unwelcome visitors - not always successfully. Let's meet the teams...

ISIHAC Intros

I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue Introductions

Hello & welcome to I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue. This week we can promise you a nail-biting contest...followed by a nose picking contest...  (19 Mar 1983)

Hello & welcome to I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue - the show where fun and laughter go together like a horse and marriage. (Northampton 23 Nov 1996)

Hello & welcome to I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue - it's the show where quality and comedy go together like the Lone Ranger and Toronto. (Cambridge 07 Dec 1996)

Hello & welcome to I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue - the show that stands Head & Shoulders above the wash basin next to the soap dish. (Cheltenham 29 Jun 1996)

Hello & welcome to I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue - the show that is to comedy what Florence was to the Renaissance...& Zebedee was to the Industrial Revolution. ()

Hello, & welcome to the programme which a recent poll described as "not at all the sort of thing we enjoy in Poland"... (Paris Theatre 26 Aug 1975)

ISIHAC Intros