Warning Sign

 From The New Yorker by Christopher Weyant

Two blondes went deer hunting and they managed to shoot a deer.

They started dragging the deer by the hind legs to get it back to their truck.

An experienced hunter saw them and said, "Girls, you're doing it wrong. You're dragging against the grain of the deer's hair. If you drag by the antlers, you'll be pulling with the grain of the hair, and it will be much easier."

So, the two blondes started dragging their deer by the antlers.

After about 20 minutes, one said to the other, "You know, that old guy was right! It's so much easier to drag the deer by the antlers, it's like it's just gliding along the ground."

"Yeah, he was," said the other blonde. "But we sure are getting far away from our truck."

Assessment

From JimBenton

A hunter kills and eats a bald eagle, and is arrested for violating the Endangered Species Act.

He pleads guilty, and throws himself on the mercy of the court.

"Your Honour," the hunter said, "I had no idea that it was illegal to kill and eat a bald eagle. If you let me go, I'll never do it again."

"You've committed a very serious crime," the judge replies. "But you clearly weren't aware of the law, so I'm willing to overlook it this one time. However, before I let you go, I'm going to ask you to do one thing."

"Anything, Your Honour," the hunter replies. "What is it?"

The judge says, "It's been illegal to kill a protected species for many years, so very few people have ever eaten a bald eagle. For the record, can you please tell everyone what a bald eagle tastes like?"

The hunter thinks for a moment and then replies, "It tastes pretty good. Kind of like a cross between a spotted owl and a condor."