On her wedding night a bride says to her husband, "I must confess dear, I used to be a hooker".
He says, "That's a bit of a shock, but I must confess, I find it quite erotic. Tell me about it."
She replies, "Well, my name was Nigel and I used to play for Wigan."
After 10 years, the wife starts to think their kid looks strange so she decides to do a DNA test.
She finds out that the kid is actually from completely different parents.
Wife: "Honey, I have something very serious to tell you."
Husband: "What's up?"
Wife: "According to DNA test results, this is not our kid."
Husband: "We already knew that, you remember, don't you?
When we were leaving the hospital, we noticed that our baby had soiled the nappy we'd just put on him. And you said:
'Please go change the baby, I'll wait for you here.'"
My father was a masochist who liked to have an ice cold shower every morning.
So he didn't.
The father Answers, 'Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway!
Your mum and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo.
Then I set up a date via email with your mum and we met at a cyber-cafe.
We sneaked into a secluded room, and googled each other.
There your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive.
As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a little pop-up appeared that said: "You got male!"'
