Old Jokes

  

    

   

There's a rumour going round that Spandau Ballet are going to re-release one of their old singles.

I hope it's not True.

Water Safety

From Mark Lynch

Just a warning, in case you're thinking of buying a watch from Amazon.

I learned the hard way that if it says you can swim wearing it, this only applies if you can already swim without it.

Pool Shark

From Loading Artist

I used to be addicted to swimming.

But, I'm very proud to say that I've been dry for six years.

Swimming

From xkcd

A gorgeous woman waved to me on the beach yesterday,

but there was no way I was swimming out that far to talk to her.

Trophies

From Buni Comic

A shark could swim faster than me.

But, I could probably run faster than a shark.

So, in a triathlon, it would all come down to who is the better cyclist.

Fountain Of Youth

From Toonhole

I went to the swimming baths today and had a pee in the deep end. The lifeguard noticed and blew his whistle so loud that I almost fell in.

Fountain Of Youth

Fast Lane

 

From Teddy Tietz

 

First Known Picture Of Michael Phelps