Carbon Dating

Three years ago, I asked my crush to go out with me.

Last week, I asked her to marry me.

She said no both times.

Beautiful Music

From Twistwood Tales

Which Icelandic singer was named after a city in England? Was it:

A. Norwich

B. York

C. Leeds

Crush

From Cyanide & Happiness

My daughter is at that stage where she finds it embarrassing to be seen out with me.

When I dropped her off at school this morning, she wouldn't even kiss me goodbye.

She just left me standing there in my underpants and sombrero.