Flight Mode

From The Argyle Sweater

Top Tip

It's pronounced "scone", not "scone".

A Society Grows Great When Old Men Plant Trees Whose Shade They Know They Shall Never Sit In

From Leigh Rubin

If trees produced Wi-Fi we'd be planting them everywhere.

It's a shame they only produce oxygen and store carbon.

Engine Trouble

From OffTheMark

How come our cars have to be roadworthy when the roads don't have to be car worthy?

Foreign Language

From Chucklebros

What language do the Vatican Police speak?

Pig Latin!

The Hard Life

From AThirdThing

I'm sick of hearing all those 1970s novelty songs that they play at my local holiday camp.

So, this year I'm off to sunny Spain.

Interview Faux Pas

From Bliss

Interviewer: "This says you tend to jump to conclusions"

Me: "So I'm hired?"

LGBT???

From Mark Lynch

Shopping for antiques won't make you gay . . . but it may make you buy curios.