The Hard Life

From AThirdThing

I'm sick of hearing all those 1970s novelty songs that they play at my local holiday camp.

So, this year I'm off to sunny Spain.

Interview Faux Pas

From Bliss

Interviewer: "This says you tend to jump to conclusions"

Me: "So I'm hired?"

LGBT???

From Mark Lynch

Shopping for antiques won't make you gay . . . but it may make you buy curios.

Proportion

From Pardon My Planet

If someone calls you fat just ignore them.

You're bigger than that.

Writing Cheques

From Bob Eckstein

How did the Australian pay for his new chess set?

Cheque, mate.

What Flavour

From Loading Artist

Be The Best

From The Bent Pinky by Scott Metzger

I have 11 New Year Resolutions...

1) Never make resolutions

2) Accept that life contains paradoxes

3) Use the binary number system more often