Stressful Activity

From Faceless

My girlfriend accused me of cheating on her...

She's beginning to sound just like my wife!

Cat Lady

From Reality Check

I'm waiting for some Elvis memorabilia to be delivered, but it's been held up in the depot (in the depoooooot).

Peek-a-boo

From JimBenton

INSTRUCTOR: pull your shute!
ME: my shoe?
INSTRUCTOR: your parachute!
ME: my pair of shoes?
[later]
CORONER: Where's his shoes?