I went out for a winter walk this morning and found a box of frozen fish on the pavement.
I was going to hand it in to the police, but then decided it was a case of Findus Kippers!
Showing posts with label dating. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dating. Show all posts
Friday, 28 August 2026
Sunday, 3 May 2026
Thursday, 19 March 2026
Carbon Dating
Three years ago, I asked my crush to go out with me.
Last week, I asked her to marry me.
She said no both times.
Wednesday, 28 January 2026
Robocat
Him: "We should go out for a coffee sometime."
Her: "How about 10 tomorrow?"
Him: "No, that's too many, I'd never get to sleep afterwards."
Thursday, 9 October 2025
Catherine Fish
Women call me ugly until they find out how much money I make.
Then they call me ugly and poor.
Friday, 27 September 2024
Finding A Wife
I just found out that my wife has a Tinder profile and I'm furious.
She is absolutely not "adventurous", and "fun to be around"!
Wednesday, 5 August 2020
Second Wave Beginnings
I'm on fire with the ladies at the moment. I went into six bars yesterday and in all six I was asked for my name and mobile number. Haven't heard from any of them yet though.
Saturday, 25 July 2020
Wednesday, 15 July 2020
Friday, 18 October 2019
Wednesday, 18 September 2019
Monday, 27 May 2019
Monday, 23 April 2018
Wednesday, 28 March 2018
Tuesday, 6 February 2018
Monday, 18 December 2017
Monday, 16 October 2017
Tuesday, 6 October 2015
Wednesday, 8 July 2015
Tuesday, 30 December 2014
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