Showing posts with label sun. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sun. Show all posts
Wednesday, 19 August 2026
Thursday, 13 August 2026
Eclipse
And for anyone who missed it, let Roger McGough guide you toward other eclipses:
The hamburger flipped across the face of the bun
The frisbee winning the race against its own shadow
The cricket ball dropping for six in front of the church clock
On a golden plate, a host of communion wafers
The brown contact lens sliding across the blue iris
The palming of small change
Everyday eclipses.
Out of the frying pan, the tossed pancake orbits the Chinese lampshade
The water bucket echoing into the well
The black, snookering the cue ball against the green baize
The winning putt on the eighteenth
The tiddlywink twinking toward the tiddlycup
Everyday eclipses.
Neck and neck in the hot-air balloon race
Holding up her sign, the lollipop lady blots out the Belisha beacon
The foaming tankard thumped onto the beermat
The plug into the plughole
In the fruit bowl, the orange rolls in front of the peach
Every day eclipses another day.
Goodbye bald patch, Hello yarmulke
A sombrero tossed into the bullring
Leading the parade, the big bass drum, we hear cymbals but cannot see them
One eclipse eclipses another eclipse.
To the cold white face, the oxygen mask
But too late
One death eclipses another death.
The baby’s head, the mother’s breast
The open O of the mouth seeking the warm O of the nipple
One birth eclipses another birth
Everyday eclipses.
Roger McGough
Wednesday, 10 August 2022
Friday, 3 January 2020
Monday, 20 May 2019
Tuesday, 5 December 2017
PunFest
1. Just ate a frozen apple. Hardcore.
2. Bought a litre of Tipp-Ex yesterday. Huge mistake.
3. I've started a business building yachts in my attic. Sails are going through the roof.
4. I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
5. I tried to catch some fog today but I mist.
6. I bought a dog from my local blacksmith. When I got it home it made a bolt for the door.
7. Last night I went to a comedy and philosophy convention. Laughed more than I thought.
8. Just watched a wildlife documentary on beavers. Best dam programme I've seen in a long time.
9. Jokes about German sausage are the Wurst.
10. I was trying to explain puns to my kleptomaniac friend today, but she kept taking things literally.
11. I stole a rabbit today. Then I had to make a run for it.
12. A woman told me she recognised me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore
13. Just got a job playing triangle in a reggae band. I stand at the back and ting.
14. What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back four seconds.
15. My wife told me I was a fool to build a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta.
16. Just watched a documentary on how ships are kept together. Riveting.
17. I used to have a problem where I couldn't stop naming classic American sitcoms, but I'm over it now. Happy Days.
18. My wife's working in a bowling alley.
Ten pin?
No, permanent.
19. Police just caught a man stealing 50 helium balloons. They had to let him go.
20. How do you approach an angry Welsh cheese? Caerphilly.
21. Jokes about opticians just get cornea and cornea.
22. A steak pun is a rare medium well done.
23. I was walking the dogs the other day when all of a sudden they vanished into thin air. Not sure where they went, but I've got some leads.
24. Did you know that owls can't breed in the rain? It's too wet to woo.
25. When my wife told me I had to stop impersonating a flamingo, I decided to put my foot down
26. Dad: I've just been diagnosed with Tom Jones syndrome.
Mum: Is it common?
Dad: It's Not Unusual
27. My wife asked me if I could please stop singing 'Wonderwall'. I said maybe.
Friday, 29 July 2016
Tuesday, 12 July 2016
Friday, 2 January 2015
Monday, 14 July 2014
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