Totem Pole Artist

From Joseph Nowak

I bought some of those flavoured condoms the other day.

I said to my wife, "Let's play a game. I'll put one on and you have to try and guess what flavour it is."

So, she went underneath the duvet and after a moment or two she said, "Cheese and onion?"

I said, "For goodness sake, woman, give me a chance to get the damn thing on."

Christmas Wish

From GoodBearComics

As it's Christmas soon my wife's been leaving jewellery catalogues all over the house.

So, I've taken the hint.

I've got her a magazine rack.

Bush Barbie Condom Ad

 

Happy Liaison

From smbc

Time Capsule

From LunarBaboon

A Paddling Of Ducks

This aubergine looks like Jemima



Puddleduck



When Contextual Adverts Go Wrong





This courgette looks like a duck



Far Side 1



This doorknob looks like a duck



The duck?  The dog was attacking ducks.



This grape looks like a duck




Mr. & Mrs. Duck are staying in a posh hotel on their honeymoon.
They've gone to bed together for the first time and are getting very excited when Mrs. Duck realises that in their haste neither of them has brought a condom with them.
So Mr. Duck phones down to reception to order one.
"Certainly Sir", replies the receptionist after listening to Mr. Duck's request, "Would you like me to put in on your bill for you?"
"No I would not", yells back an incensed Mr. Duck, "What do you think I am, some sort of pervert or something?"

This tomato looks like a duck



Far Side 2

An article that's been getting passed around the internet lately is about Anatidaephobia, or the fear of being watched by a duck.
What has made people keep forwarding it is because on the same page is an ad for Aflac.
Get it?
You're reading about fear of being watched by a duck, and there's that omnipresent Aflac duck?
Just about makes you shudder, doesn't it?

The only problem is, anatidaephobia is made up.  By Gary Larson, in fact, in this cartoon: