Developing Problem

From At Random Comics

Me: I need batteries so that I can tell what time it is.

Friend: Is it for a clock?

Me: I don’t know, that’s why I need the batteries.

Commanding Respect

From The Perry Bible Fellowship

If you have just left school or uni and have started working at your first adult job you may be wondering if this is all there is to life.

No, it is not: there is also back pain.

Still Practicing

From Speedbump

My wife yelled from the bedroom asking, "Do you ever get a shooting pain across your body like someone's got a voodoo doll of you and they're stabbing it?"

I replied, "No."

She yelled back, "How about now?"

The Perks Of Being A Dentist

From Faceless

My wife's just back from the gynaecologist.

She said "The doctor told me I can't have sex for a month".

I said "What did your dentist say?"

If 2020 Was A Game

A Thinking Man

What deep thinkers men are. I mowed the lawn today, and after doing so I sat down and had a cold beer. The day was really quite beautiful, and the drink

facilitated some deep thinking.

My wife walked by and asked me what I was doing and I said 'nothing'. The reason I said that instead of saying 'just thinking' is because she would have said 'about what'. At that point I would have to explain that men are deep thinkers about various topics which would lead to other questions.

Finally I thought about an age old question: Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the nuts? Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the nuts.

Well, after another beer, and some heavy deductive thinking, I have come up with the answer to that question. Getting kicked in the nuts is more painful than having a baby; and here is the reason for my conclusion. A year or so after giving birth, a woman will often say, "It might be nice to have another child." On the other hand, you never hear a guy say, "You know, I think I would like another kick in the nuts."

I rest my case. Time for another beer.

The Downside Of Crucifixion

 From See Mike Draw