Dangerous Game Hunter

From The Argyle Sweater

I bought a second-hand guitar from Adam Ant.

He quoted he fifty quid, but said for an extra tenner he’d throw in a stand and deliver.

Emotional Rescue

From Buni Comic

I just had an Adam Ant ice cream.

Nothing special, just standard vanilla.

Old Jokes

  

    

   

There's a rumour going round that Spandau Ballet are going to re-release one of their old singles.

I hope it's not True.

Going The Extra Mile

From Twonk Comics

I was in a taxi the other day and the driver asked, “Is it okay if I put some music on?”

I responded, “Yeah, that’s fine, go ahead”.

He said, “Kiss?”.

I replied, “Look, just play the music first and then we’ll see how I feel”.

Nightime Fairy

From Bizarro

From Waynovision

I had to get my pet lizard some Valium as he has been a bit stressed out.

Now he's a calmer, calmer, calmer chameleon!

Trap

From Leigh Rubin

Elvis, my pet mouse, has just died.

He was caught in a trap.

Flying High

From Bizarro

How do you turn a goose into a musician?

You boil it until it's Bill Withers.

The Hard Life

From AThirdThing

I'm sick of hearing all those 1970s novelty songs that they play at my local holiday camp.

So, this year I'm off to sunny Spain.

Our Tune

From Andertoons

Once you've heard one bagpipe tune, you've heard them both!

Phonetically Defined 6

From Wrong Hands

Top 10 Dog/Cat Pop Songs

From Scott Metzger

From Scott Metzger

Stereotypes

From Wrong Hands

Interesting Fact

Spandau Ballet only had one UK number one single.

That is True.

Balloon Vending Machine

From Leigh Rubin

What kind of music do balloons really hate?

Pop music.

Mr Eurovision Song Contest Man

Beautiful Music

From Twistwood Tales

Which Icelandic singer was named after a city in England? Was it:

A. Norwich

B. York

C. Leeds

Country Music

From Bliss

Country music is played all over the world

because

national anthems are country music.

Cake Mix

From Break of Day

I went into a new bakery today where all the cakes were 50p.

On the counter I noticed one cake that cost £1.00.

I asked the baker why it wasn't 50p like the others.

He said, "That's because it's Madeira cake".

Heavy Metal

From Dark Side Of The Horse

Today really has been a bit of a strange day!

First, I found a hat full of money . . .

. . . and then I was chased by an angry man with a guitar.

Everyday Is A Winding Road

From Reality Check

I went to HMV earlier and asked the guy behind the counter if they had any Run DMC records.

He said "Walk this way".

It's Covid Time