When You Order Wine

From Truth Facts

I found a wallet with £20 in it.

I wasn't sure how to proceed, but then I thought, "What would Jesus do?"

So, I turned it into wine.

How Placebos Work

From GoatToSelf

Affirmations work?

Yeah, you keep telling yourself that.

What Red Wine Tastes Like

From Truth Facts

A bloke got chatting to a girl in a club. "Can I buy you a drink?" he asked.

"Have you not got a girlfriend," she replied, "because guys like you always seem to have girlfriends in my experience?"

"No, sadly not," he assured her. "We broke up just over a month ago."

"Oh, I'm really sorry to hear that," she said." Go on then, I'll have a white wine, please."

Well, after a few more drinks and a bit of a kiss and a cuddle, they headed off back to her place and made mad, passionate love for the next few hours.

Then, while he was putting his clothes back on, she said, "You're good looking, you seem to be a genuinely nice guy, and you're absolutely amazing in bed. So can I ask you why on earth you split up with your girlfriend?

"He took a deep breath and said, "My wife found out about her."

2022

From Dinos and Comics

I love red wine.

In fact, I've just joined a wine club.

We meet at 9 o'clock every morning in the park.

Christmas Party / Tree

From Liz Climo

House Cleaning Opportunity

"Heard a Dr. on TV saying in this time of Coronavirus staying at home we should focus on inner peace. To achieve this we should always finish things we start and we all could use more calm in our lives. I looked through my house to find things I'd started and hadn't finished. So I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of Chardonnay, a bodle of Baileys, a butle of wum, tha mainder of Valiumun srciptuns, an a box a chocletz. Yu haf no idr how feckin fablus I feel rite now. Sned this to all who need inner piss. An telum u luvum. And two hash yer wands, stafe day avrybobby!

Con-noisseur

From WaynoVision

Just The Wine Talking?

 

From Bizarro

 

WWJD?

The Wine Guide to Better Living

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Envy

Really good advice ...

The secret of enjoying a good wine:

 

1. Open the bottle to allow it to breathe.

2. If it does not look like it's breathing, give it mouth-to-mouth.