Frozen

From Loose Parts

Why don't igloos have corners?

Corners are 90 degrees, the igloo would melt.

Bathtime

From Joseph Nowak

Who says Jesus couldn't perform miracles?

He managed to find mates named Matthew, Mark, Luke and John hanging around in the Middle East.

Amnesia Support Group Meeting

From Bound and Gagged

I'm still a member of Constipation Club, even though I haven't been for ages.

Super New Clothes

From Looks Good On Paper

I placed an order on Deliveroo and it said my meal would take an hour.

So, I've just ordered some bread and olives from them while I wait.

Worst Consequences Of Sex

From Truth Facts

Sorry I said "nice phone" when you showed me a photo of your baby.

Fortune Cookie

From Mark Lynch

I spent five hundred quid on a limo rental and when I got there, I discovered that it didn't have a driver.

All that money and nothing to chauffeur it.

Kid Napping

From GoatToSelf

After a long discussion and practical evaluation, my wife and I decided we don't want to have kids.

We'll be telling them tomorrow, after dinner.