Detour

From Bliss

Travel Update:

A lorry carrying incontinence pants has shed its load on the motorway.

Police are warning of long delays due to rubberknickers!

Lest We Forget

From Rhymes With Orange

The man who discovered the wind chill factor was buried yesterday.

He was 82, but felt like 63!

Old Tattoos

 From Bizarro

Yesterday I went to a temporary tattoo parlour to get a tattoo.

After it wouldn't wash off this morning I went back to complain, but the tattoo parlour wasn't there.

Follow Your Dreams

From Dinos and Comics

Wow! What a session that was in the bedroom.

I must have burnt off an incredible number of calories.

I hate putting the duvet cover on.

Brexit

From Jonesy

How much space did Brexit free up in the EU?

1GB

Snail Mailman

From Loading Artist

I've been waiting almost 6 weeks for the glue I ordered from Amazon to arrive.

I think it must have got stuck in the post!

Bear Trap

From Loose Parts

I've ordered some German food over the internet.

The saurkraut has arrived but the wurst is yet to come.